Daily Steps On Our Road to Recovery for Week of 21 April 2003

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Monday 21 April 2003

The Good Life is recovery from Lust.

DSM [302.xx] :)) I am skipping ahead in my desk reference, because the subject of lust came up. "Sexual Disorders" in the DSM-III Desk Reference are defined as any of the deviations from "normal" sexual functioning. I will go through each of these "deviations" separately next. I find it interesting that the DSM will talk about the opposite of lust, [302.71] "Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder", and not deal with "Hyperactive Sexual Desire Disorder" at all. Most spiritual teachers must deal with this most common form of "disorder" and yet the DSM only deals with special forms of lust, but did not deal with the most common form. I find that amusing. Perhaps the American Psychological Association [APA] will deal with this subject in the DSM-XX. :)) Perhaps they have already and I have not seen a current enough version.

Lust is just another form of anger. Anger is just life energy we create to get what we want. Anger is just life energy we create to change from where we are to where we want to be. When we are lusting for the opposite sex we are just wanting a physical connection, physical intimacy. That is the good intention at the physical level of our biological imperatives. The good intention behind lust at the spiritual level is just that we want to return to a spiritual connection, spiritual intimacy. What we really want at our highest levels is a return to intimacy with our inner opposite sex. We have both inner masculine and feminine aspects. We want to be whole, we want to be wholly one, we want to be holy.

By transforming our lust by understanding and forgiveness, we become holy. We again are whole without guilt. Without guilt we no longer need anger. Without guilt we do not need lust. We do not get over lust by suppressing lust any more than we get over anger by suppressing anger. We get over lust like anger by transforming a small part of our anger and lust at a time. Why not enjoy the recovery process of each small transformation?

Tuesday 22 April 2003

The Good Life is recovery from Exhibitionism.

DSM [302.40] "Exhibitionism" is defined as a person with sexual urges to exhibit themselves to strangers for over six months. Do politicians or actors and actresses count? :)) What is this particular addiction about?

Like any other addiction, this give a rush of life energy like in sexual excitement. There is the excitement of doing this forbidden act. There is the excitement of sharing an intimate part of themselves. There is the excitement of watching other get excited. There is the excitements of ____,_____, ... You can fill in the blanks. There are those that exhibit themselves to strangers for money. Is the addiction money or exhibitionism or both? :))

That rush of life energy tells us something. That life energy is telling us that this is a lower form, that represents a spiritual goal. The doing something forbidden is going on a spiritual path in public. Sharing something intimate is part of the spiritual path. Watching others get turned on to spirit is exciting.

Why do we do the lower form of the spiritual? Guilt. Unforgiven judgments.

So what to do to transform the lower life energy to the higher? Learn to forgive and all the other spiritual skills as habits to replace what we learned from the most everything else...

Wednesday 23 April 2003

The Good Life is recovery from Fetishism.

DSM [302.81] "Fetishism" is defined as a person with sexual urges to use non living objects as a part of their sexual acts for over six months. Why is their sexual excitement about a non living object? The object may represent something, that triggers their unconscious.

What are they triggering? They may be triggering unconscious guilts in an attempt to heal. Why does this sometimes not heal them over time? They may not understand what they are doing and just acquire more guilt from what they are doing. How can they get out of this cycle? They could go through their cycles with more and more awareness and forgiveness and understanding. They could ask the Holy Spirit to lead them to a teacher that could help them. They could affirm that they are being healed by what they are doing, until they are healed by what they are doing.

Why else could they be using non living objects? Perhaps they are afraid of living objects. Perhaps they got some of their wounds from living objects. Then it could help to learn to love more living objects are they are. Then it could help to learn how to be harmless to other living objects so that they are not harmed.

Of course what helps them, can help us. The form of the "dis-order" is not important, the form of the recovery road or teaching tool is important.

Thursday 24 April 2003

The Good Life is recovery from a need to touch.

DSM [302..89] "Frotteurism" is defined as a person with sexual urges to touch and rub a non consenting person a part of their sexual acts for over six months. Interestingly, it is the touching that is the exciting part. DSM-III says the fact that they are being coercive, is not the exciting part. A simple test is to see if persons with this diagnosis get just as much thrill out of touching people that want to be touched.

In any case, here we have a desire to touch and rub another person. An extreme case of wanting to connect. A desire to connect. A lot of sexual urges are about connecting. The spiritual metaphor is more obvious here. The difference is that in healthy spirit all connection is consenting. The Holy Spirit does not come uninvited.

The Holy Spirit is always singing its siren song of love, but only connects when invoked and invited. One does not need the diagnosis of frotteurism to need to connect with others and to connect with the Holy Spirit. We all need some degree of these. People with healthy connections live longer and happier. Healthier connection come easier from first connecting with the Holy Spirit. Be touched today.

I wanting to touch another when they are ill and be touched when we are ill is universal. There is a universal desire to have a healing touch and be healed by touch. A desire for health is a universal desire. There is a universal desire to have a wealthy touch, a happiness touch. One can not give health, wealth and happiness unless one has health, wealth and happiness. This is a universal desire for spirit, the Holy Spirit. Ask to be touched each day.

Like any symptom, the symptom is trying to heal us. The symptom is telling us what we need. In this extreme, we need to touch others. Our spirit has a need to touch others and to give us pleasure. The challenge is to get that need met in healthy ways. How much different is it when a performer touches a lot of us at the same time and gets off by their need to perform?

Friday 25 April 2003

The Good Life is recovery from Pedophilia.

Today, another break from the "disorders" of the DSM-III Desk Reference. Today's break is about another book I added to my bookstore of valuable books on the Road to Recovery. You can read what I wrote about this book at A Path to Healing - A Guide to Wellness for Body, Mind, and Soul. I met the author at one of her presentations at a local library and she represented the truths of her book in person.

Now back from our break to the "disorders" of the DSM-III Desk Reference. Today the disorder is "Pedophilia", [302.20]. Pedophilia is defined by the DSM as a person with sexual urges for sexual activity with children for over six months. Here we have a desire to connect intimately with children.

Their true desire is to connect with their own inner child. From the viewpoint of society they have lost control and they should have control. A tragic and sad bind to be in and of great promise. Here they have an incentive to get in contact with their inner child. They could learn to nurture their inner child. They could learn to listen to their inner child. They could learn to see what their inner child sees. They could drop control and start to learn team work with their inner child.

As JC said, we enter the kingdom of heaven as children.

Very Respectfully,

Michael

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Leadership

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A daily hint has published each day since June 1996. This is past my fifth year anniversary, since starting my web pages. I started my daily page, because it is useful for me to look for some recovery tip or secret each day for my spiritual growth. we and I only need one secret to work on and let it work on us each day. They are secrets because they are usually the opposite of what the majority of society teaches. They must be secret because they are not commonly used. A friend of mine once said "Common Sense is not much in Common.". Now that I have grandchildren I am also writing for them. I would have really liked for my grandparents and my parents to have passed on more of what they learned.

What is happening now?

I now have completed my second copy of my two CDROM's, full of free programs, for my college class. I am sending my current version, to anyone that sends me $7.

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